Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Diamonds Are Not My Best Friend

I must have been sprawled out out on my bed, sneakers on, staring at the ceiling for a good 45 minutes. I was contemplating 1 of 3 things: Jumping out the window, doing the huge pile of dishes or eating some sugar. I went with the sugar; It always heals. I imagine booze has the same effect, only I need more of it and despite my mood, I'm still watching those calories! Anyway, it was a terrible, terrible day. I wouldn't say it was horrific because I've had much worse but it was bad. DGR sure doesn't make my life easy. In fact, he really just pisses me off. Sometimes I wish that he wasn't a pathological liar or even better: that I lacked a spine. Perhaps I could have continued on with him knowing he was lying about everything under the sun. All this ridiculousness could be erased from my memory and things could be the way they were before. But I have a spine AND a brain; No liar will ever be the one.

It all started with asking him when he was going to mail me the monthly check for the ring. You see, I have this $5K ring that sits in my apartment. It's sits around in the box for weeks until that certain day when I'm feeling odd. Then, I slip the ring on, not because I'm sad that I'm not marrying him but more or less because I'm sad about not getting to wear it. It's my ring and my ex/non-dream guy wants to re gift it to a new chic. I can't fathom my dream ring on another hand; especially someone he loves. So, I place it back in the box and stash it in the dark. That ring is as terrible as today but I can't let it go.

Anyway, he ruined my day and I should throw that ring out the window. OK, maybe tomorrow.

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