I wasn’t in the greatest mood today so, everything was making me angry. I didn’t even notice the time but as I was about to pass Asbury Park HS I realized exactly what time it was: 2:30pm. This means that traffic gets diverted onto side streets so the freakin’ hoodlums can spill onto the street near the school with out fear of being hit by mildly irate drivers, such as myself. AP doesn’t even mess around with those silly crossing guards; they have actual cops directing traffic. If you’ve been to AP before then you’d understand the need for REAL cops. If you haven’t been to AP then I don’t recommend going unless you bring your mace and/or your gat!
Anyway, as I drive onto the side street there is this girl with the skinniest legs I have ever seen. I swear she was like 6ft tall with praying mantis-like rods for legs. I wouldn’t even be commenting on her pegs but she was a total crack head. She and her bean pole legs were walking in the middle of the road while shoving a bag of Doritos in her crack head face. Most normal people would move to the side of the road when a car is approaching but not this long-legged freak. She keeps up this absurd behavior for a prolonged 3 minutes. Then, as I finally pass her and barely refrain from yelling obscenities, she throws the empty bag of Doritos on the ground and proceeds to give me a dirty look. In the age of reduce, recycle and reuse(or is it stop, drop and roll? I can’t be sure!), who the hell throws garbage in the road? 7 hours later and I’m still angry. I’d like to whack her Tonya Harding style…right in the back of those stupid stick legs.