Crazy Gymantics

I want to ram my car into people at the gym who fight for close parking spaces. Is there really a point to this? How about you park further and walk a bit? I believe we are all here for a common goal: exercise! Perhaps, I'm just getting old and a tad bit forgetful but I park in the same vicinity daily or I simply get confused on my way out! I figure that these parking lot fighters are probably the same people who think the gym is more of a club than a place for working out. We all know those chic's that wear make-up and have their have hair and nails done like it's Saturday night, everyday. They are there simply for a self esteem boost rather than the 25 calories they burn "jogging" on the treadmill. Of course there are also those guys that talk to EVERYONE at the gym. Dude, this isn't freakin' speed dating or a chat room, move on! These people clog up machines and free-weights like they own them! If we eliminated just HALF of these people, workouts would be SO much faster. Don't get me wrong, I fully enjoy watching these spectacles while jogging on the treadmill (And YES, I'm actually exercising.) In short, please save your awkward social hour for the weekend and let me evade any future love handles!